Jul 15
Language betrays us all, young and old. As adults, we learn to keep a poker face and hide our feelings. Kids, on the other hand, wear their emotions on their sleeves — none more so than Junebug, who at four is a whirlwind of big thoughts and even bigger feelings.
Sometime around Munchkin’s fourth birthday a switch had flipped. He had retained some toddler tendencies, even regressing a bit when Junebug was born, but becoming a big brother also helped him grow up quite a bit that year. Junebug, who recently turned four, shows no sign of wanting to flip a similar switch. The baby in the family, she appears content to stretch out her babyhood as long as possible. This is great in some ways (she has long reigned as the best snuggler in the family) and awful in others (Munchkin’s threenager tantrums were frequent but had nothing on the level of intensity she is able to generate). On some days, this dichotomy is enough to make one’s head spin.
Four days admittedly makes for a small sample size, but we’re hopeful that our latest transition might help Junebug turn the page on some of the troublesome behavior that had plagued us the last few months. One important silver lining we had noted at the outset of the pandemic, which persisted during our initial months in Sedona, was the positive behavior change our self-isolation had sparked in our kids. Forced to rely more on each other and having no one outside our nuclear family to interact with, the kids became marginally more pliant and considerably kinder to each other. As they entered schools in the fall and made friends, some of those gains were erased, and Junebug in particular started acting out more. If our initial few days of home quarantine are any indication, the shock of our most recent relocation appears to be having a similar effect as the lockdown and our evacuation had caused in the spring.
The kids had their last day of school in Sedona yesterday. Munchkin brought home a bag stuffed with workbooks and art projects. Junebug, who had been bringing home her preschool projects at the end of each week, came home with something far better. Her teachers helped her make an impressive array of art with her handprints — everything from a Thanksgiving turkey to a clover leaf — which they had turned into a 2021 calendar. They also created a laminated memory book filled with pictures and Junebug’s esoteric answers to various questions.
Oct 24
One would think that after six and a half years of parenthood we would know better, but expectation management is something we still struggle with. Or maybe it’s more the case that the pandemic has rendered wishful thinking a particularly potent force. Or perhaps it’s just that chronic sleep deprivation has scrambled our neurons. Even before we had kids we knew that in early parenthood everything is a phase — both the good and the bad: we had heard plenty of other parents proclaim this fact as gospel. Knowing that it is so, however, does not make it any easier to wrap one’s mind around just how long some of these phases last.
For quite some time now, we have been living under the oppressive tyranny of a vocal, perpetually aggrieved minority, and there doesn’t seem to be any end in sight…
When we first arrived in Sedona, we tried to go hiking as often as possible, taking in the breathtaking landscapes in red rock country, eager to stretch our legs after several weeks of confinement in Manila. Then D discovered the local wetlands and other birding spots, and soon thereafter midday temperatures rose too precipitously to make hiking in the high desert even remotely enjoyable. Before this week, our last red rock hike had been along the Pig Tail Trail with S’s mom when she visited us several months ago.
Sep 7
There is a fine line between complaining and acknowledging everyday hardships, between glossing over difficulties and focusing on the bright side of life. Writing is a selective exercise, and though we do not shy away from addressing specific challenges, as a general rule we try to focus our blog on the positives, if for no other reason than that doing so helps us maintain perspective amid the ups-and-downs and uncertainties of our lifestyle. Sometimes, however, we get stuck in a rut.
Of the many difficult decisions that have been rendered immeasurably more challenging by the pandemic none appear to be as fraught as the choice between home-based education and sending kids back to physical schools. The stakes seem high, there is little in the way of attractive options, risks and drawbacks abound, and each potential option galvanizes vocal criticism. The lack of coherent plans and policies that seek to restart the economy without addressing childcare and education needs are maddening. At the same time, we are also sympathetic to teachers’ concerns about the difficulty of mitigating risks for in-person instruction.
The impish smile that frequently lights up Junebug’s face when we point a camera in her direction can be misleading. The last couple of months have been a real struggle. Whether the blame lies with the lack of peer play occasioned by our prolonged isolation, comparative lack of attention as we focus on Munchkin’s studies, her age and changing sleeping patterns, or a combination of these factors, we may never know. What is certain is that Junebug’s sweet disposition has given way to a mercurial temperament that has made life significantly more unpleasant for all of us.
towels packed, will travel 